Death and Suicide

Suicide prevention month

September is Suicide prevention month. While most people are afraid of death, there are also those who feel that death must be attained to achieve freedom from their difficulties and pain. How does facing death help with suicide prevention? Here are some examples:

• Facing death helps you hold those you care for closer.
• Facing your fear of death helps you put down your walls and can help break down barriers between you and loved ones. When you are more open, it’s easier to hear others. It’s easier to care for others enough to reach out and say, “Hey are you okay? Are you really? I am here. I love you.” all too often, we are blindsided when someone we know- or worse, someone we love so much commits suicide. We are left with such devastating grief and pain and thoughts of, “Why? If only I knew!” “I had no idea how much pain she/he was going through.” “I would’ve done everything to help if I knew…”
• Facing death can help push you to try live a more meaningful life.
• Trying to overcome your fear of death can help you find true purpose in life.
• Facing death can help you find and experience a much deeper happiness than the superficial, passing experiences of happiness in this world.

Death through suicide is not a happy or good death

Suicide is not a way to become free. The ancient wisdom, ‘Aham Brahmasmi’ means “I am an eternal being, I am not my body.” This means we, the eternal being, continue to live even when our physical body as ‘died.’ Suicide simply brings the death of one’s body. It does not end our misery. Nor does suicide bring happiness or relief to those left behind. The grief and pain caused by suicide often affects not just one, but often 3 generations (parents, wife/siblings/friends and children).

Suicide has devastating effects for all

My first experience with someone I know committing suicide was when I was about 10 years old, when one of my older sister’s classmates committed suicide. I remember feeling shocked for days. Until today, I cannot even fathom what her family have gone through. Then, a few years later, one of the sons of my parents’ close friends committed suicide. He was only a year or two older than me. They would often come to our house. He fell in with the wrong crowd and started taking drugs, and became increasingly unhappy. But still he was loved- and decades after, he is still mourned and loved. Then, not too long ago, the nephew of someone I know well, committed suicide. He left behind 3 young children- all under 10.

Be kind always

This is the kicker: we need to learn to be kind. Every person is going through some battle. Being kind will never be wasted. The man who committed suicide and left behind 3 young children had just gone through divorce. He was so devastated, he felt suicide was the only answer. Think about that.

Opening your heart, reaching out to your family, friends, to strangers- is never a waste. Live like you are dying. Speak like you are dying. Be kind, and loving. Live every day, as if it were your last. Your kindness, your reaching out, expressing care – may save a life.